Love that Never Lets Go

We knew it was coming.  We have worked with children in the foster care system and children's homes for over a decade.  Children that have experienced so much pain and difficulty channel their frustrations differently.  Many times, this results in anger outbursts and tantrums of sorts.  We had heard that Sam demonstrated his emotions through such tantrums.  So, last week when we were eating dinner with some new friends, we saw the first breakdown.  It was ugly.  We have analyzed the situation and come up with new ideas of how to respond differently next time, but meanwhile we watched this scenerio play out for over an hour.  Sam said ugly things and threatened to hurt himself.  Then, when he tried to begin to harm himself, Rene physically restrained him.  He laid on the bed and held him for over 20 minutes.  As I sat there and watched, I prayed and I sang and we tried to get him to calm down.

(I hesitate to share the details because I don't want anyone thinking differently of our boy.  He is just a child that has been hurt far more than any of us could ever imagine and certain things trigger memories for him that are unpleasant.  For many adoptive families, these episodes are normal.)

Rene kept telling him over and over again, "When you are ready, I will let go."  Finally, Sam's body went limp and he said, "I am ready."  Then he rolled over and said some very profound words.

"You are the first daddy that has ever held me like that and not let go."

Oh.my.heart!

As I sat there, I thought to myself, "Lord, how many times have I argued with you and tried to do things my way?  You knew that it would be things that would bring me harm, so You held me.  I have fought you so many times."  Oh the joy of surrender and release and the recognition that He is a Good, Good Father and He will never let us go.  What reassurance it is to know that He sees us in our worst moments and He still holds us...He still loves us...He never lets go.  

“Be determined and confident. Do not be afraid of them. Your God, the Lord himself, will be with you. He will not fail you or abandon you.” —Deuteronomy 31:6

1 Corinthians 13 reminds us of what love looks like.  These week I am reminded that love is the most important thing we can share right now.

7 Love bears all things (even the hard days of tantrums), 

believes all things (you are a precious child chosen and set apart), 

hopes all things (that with Jesus, you, son will be healed), 

endures ALL things.

8 Love never ends.